What is internal family systems (IFS)?

Internal Family Systems is a model of psychotherapy that is based on the idea that everybody has many parts, also known as sub-personalities, all interacting with each other much like the way families operate.  

Having parts is completely normal, they develop at different times throughout our lives and take on certain roles and responsibilities to help us get through difficult times.

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the goal of ifs

The goal of IFS is to embody the Self and heal our injured parts so we can live with confidence, guided by curiosity and compassion.

When I first got in touch with Vicky 5 months ago, I was struggling with social anxiety and panic attacks. I wasn’t connected to myself and by working with Vicky, I learned how to connect with the real core self, my true self. She’s very compassionate, patient and truly cares. Through IFS and breathwork I’ve been able to maintain a sense of calm and control in my life. Trust Pilot 5 * Reviews

the three types of parts

managers

A manager is a protective part of an individual’s internal system that focusses on controlling people, events, and other parts.They carry huge burdens of responsibility to help the individual fit in, identify potential threats, and manage day to day life. They strive to protect the individual from experiencing difficult emotions or situations by taking charge and making decisions on their behalf. Managers often exhibit traits such as:
  • Criticising
  • Analysing
  • Pessimism, and planning

fIREFIGHTERS

A firefighter is a protective part that springs into action to distract, numb, or supress overwhelming emotions when the pain from other parts, especially the more wounded exiles, get activated.

They are part of the internal system’s attempt to protect the individual from unbearable feelings and memories, often engaging in behaviours like:

  • Substance abuse
  • Binge-eating
  • Self-harm

EXILES

Exiles are the wounded and vulnerable parts of an individual’s internal system that hold deep wounds, store painful memories, emotions, and beliefs related to past traumatic experiences.

When exiles are activated, they can overwhelm the individual with intense emotions like sadness, fear, or shame.

The goal of IFS therapy is to heal and integrate these wounded parts to achieve greater inner harmony and self-compassion.

THE SELF

The Self is considered the core, unifying aspect of an individual that embodies qualities such as curiosity, compassion, and connectedness. It is the essence of one’s authentic being that transcends the protective parts and wounded exiles within the internal system.

The Self seves as a compassionate leader and a source of wisdom, guiding the individual toward self-awareness, healing, and integration of all parts.

In Internal Family Systems Therapy, accessing and embodying the Self is essential for acheiving internal balance, self-acceptance, and emotional well-being.

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I was fortunate to walk this path with my therapist, Vicky - a presence so calm, grounded, and steady that she created the safety I needed to grow, untangle, and release.

Over the past year, I committed to one of the most transformative journeys of my life: healing my inner child. I was fortunate to walk this path with my therapist, Vicky -a presence so calm, grounded, and steady that she created the safety I needed to grow, untangle, and release. Through this journey, layers of fear began to dissolve. I confronted limiting beliefs I didn’t even know I carried. I let go of inner blockages that had shaped my reactions, my expectations, and the way I received the world. With each session, something softened… and something strengthened.
This work liberated me. I found myself living, working, and connecting from a clearer, freer place. My meaningful relationships became richer and more authentic. The questions that once weighed heavily on my heart finally had space to breathe – and the clarity that emerged was invaluable. Inner child work is not instant. It peels gently, a layer at a time, and each layer reveals a deeper truth. But the unfolding is worth it. I am deeply grateful for this experience. It was exceptional – a gift I didn’t know I needed and I would recommend it to anyone seeking deeper alignment, peace, and a fuller sense of self.